A great opening day

Not only did the Cubs slaughter the evil, evil New York Mets 15-2, but the evil Yankees' evil Derek Jeter injured his shoulder and will be out for a month.

And to top it off, the evil White Sox lost 3-0 and were held to only three hits. The only disappointment was the Red Sox' blown save-by-committee against the Devil Rays.

But if even every other day is this good, the season should be lots of fun.