It’s only since I began regularly walking our dog, Sport, that I’ve realized how much discarded food winds up the sidewalks and gutters of your average city street — or at least, our average city street. And of course Sport seems to find every scrap.

Now, I understand how a french fry might fall out of a McDonald’s bag in the rush home, or how some bread crumbs the birds weren’t interested in could be hanging around. But on our walk last night, I saw Sport had found something.

It was dark, but I could see the outline of this massive object hanging from his little mouth. I bent down to get a closer look, and it was a damn half slab of ribs!

Not a rib. An entire half slab of discarded ribs. How does this happen? In what alternate universe are people randomly leaving half slabs of ribs on the sidewalk?

Lucinda Williams’ new album, “World Without Tears,” is hitting stores April 8. Here’s a profile of this fantastic singer-songwriter in the New York Daily News.

“Porn Star: The Legend of a Ron Jeremy” is a very funny and sad documentary look at the life of porn ambassador (and performer) Ron Jeremy. It is now on sale.

Here’s a profile/review of Jeremy and the movie I wrote for the Columbia Chronicle, and here’s a Q&A with the man himself.

I forgot to mention in my write-up yesterday about the worst parts of the Oscarcast — the retrospectives on past song-and-dance numbers and past MPAA president speeches.

Everyone hates song-and-dance numbers (last night had only one, accompanying the performance of the original song from “Chicago”), yet somehow they wasted precious minutes on screen showing us all of Oscar’s past “glories.” A trip down bad memory lane, an astute friend called it.

And the MPAA president speeches?! That’s the time everyone uses to go to the bathroom or get another beer or whatever. The MPAA president never says anything of note and just takes up space and time. A tribute to past speeches is like doing a retrospective on mold, only less interesting.

What were they thinking?

Here’s the problem with these movies that are either based on the story of a person’s life or based on a period in history, such as “Gangs of New York”: they always lie.

In small ways and big, they always distort the true life or the true history. I wonder what the point is of bothering to use historical or biographical source material (e.g., “A Beautiful Mind”) if they’re just going to twist it around so much that it barely resembles what it once was. Why not just — here’s an idea! — make something up.

Then, because I’m an obsessive-compulsive type, I’ve got to spend two hours on the Internet afterward to sort out what was true in the movie from what wasn’t. Save me the time. Make stuff up. “The Matrix” seemed to do OK with that approach. Not once during “The Matrix” did I think, “Hey, is this based on a true story?”

But now that I think of it, I wonder …

All right, I admit it. I got cocky. What else can explain my miserable performance? I only predicted 13 of 24 categories correctly last night, and still managed to tie for third place, which I suppose says more about the unpredictable nature of the awards than about the quality of my competition.

The first excuse is that I didn’t see many of the nominated film. But … enh. That’s not really a big deal. I think the better excuse is that it was an upset-filled night.

By my tally, there were at least five major upsets last night, and a couple of unexpected wins.

The upsets: First, “The Pianist’s” three wins were all upsets. Adapted screenplay, Adrien Brody for leading actor, and Roman Polanski for direction. Then there was Eminem’s surprise win in the song category (the consensus pick was “I Move On” from everyone’s best-picture winner, “Chicago”) and “Frida’s” upset in the original score category.

So that’s five categories out the window right there. Had I gotten those I would have been at a respectable 18 out of 25, a very good percentage. Then there was the animated feature win for “Spirited Away,” which I don’t think was an upset but did come as a surprise to me.

“Spirited Away” was a foreign film done in an animated style (anime) unfamiliar to the Academy’s older voters. It’s amazing they picked it over a traditional kid-friendly Disney flick, “Lilo & Stitch.”

The close calls were Renee Zellwegger, who I thought would pull it out on “Chicago’s” strength, her SAG win, and her overall lovability, especially as compared with cold fish Nicole Kidman. Original screenplay was another tough one, since only one of the nominees was up for best picture (“Gangs of New York”), and that movie’s screenplay was not widely admired.

I went for “Far From Heaven” but Almodovar pulled it out. Them’s the breaks. We did pull home a prize — a DVD of “American Beauty.” Perhaps it will remind me next time around to … look closer. Yoish.

What about the telecast itself? Brody’s win was the highlight of the evening. No one expected that. Karen and I just saw “Gangs” and Daniel Day-Lewis was fabulous in that. But I guess Oscar wanted to see a new guy take it. He gave a great speech and he did what every Jewish man in America wants to do — kiss Halle Berry. Good for him.

writes that while she’s lusted after Brody for some time she couldn’t bring herself to see “The Pianist,” seeing as how it was directed by a child rapist. And Karen was especially disturbed at the standing ovation the absent Polanski received for his director win, which is completely understandable.

I don’t know if people forget, or forgive. But at some point we should be able to separate art from the artist who has done a despicable thing. Not to forgive, but to acknowledge that someone who could do something so despicable could also be incredibly talented at his craft. It’s tragic in a sense that people who do evil things so often have some good to offer — it would be so much easier if things were different.

On the political side of things, I tallied five anti-war political statements or gestures. Four in the acceptance speeches of Brody, Almodovar, Chris Cooper and Michael Moore. A little speech from one of the co-stars of “Y Tu Mama Tambien” in the introduction to the song from “Frida,” and Susan Sarandon’s peace sign before introducing a category.

Unless you count the MPAA president’s “We love you, troops” message, in which case it’s six.

Pretty much all were handled with aplomb except for Moore’s, which was greeted with a chorus of boos as well as cheers. Obviously, folks weren’t booing because of his anti-war stance; most of Hollywood shares his views. But he wasn’t as tactful about it, I suppose.

No one should have been surprised. I thought there was a possibility Moore might be denied the Oscar because of his very well known political positions. Indeed, he is at bottom a polemicist who tries to entertain while driving home his message. Whether he’s successful or not depends on your taste, but there’s no secret about where he’s coming from.

So why the boos? Why couldn’t he just say his piece? It’s live TV, folks. Get over it. If the Academy doesn’t like folks making political statements, they should have a minute delay or something. Until then, people are going to use the platform to say whatever they want to say. The thing is that for all the talk about bad form versus good form and being respectful of the troops, etc., the truth is that the Hollywood folks are just afraid of pissing off the paying customers in the fly-over country who shell out bucks week after week for their schlock.

That’s what it’s all about. And that’s fine. There’s nothing wrong with making money. Just spare us the holier than thou attitude. Steve Martin saved the night with his remark, “The Teamsters are putting him in the trunk of a limo.” He was great again. Sharp material, very well delivered.

I’m disappointed Scorsese didn’t pull it out, but he doesn’t really need it. Sure, he’s never won best director, but does anyone doubt that he is the greatest living American director? Is there any question about the scope of his influence and breadth of his genius?

Scorsese should be very secure in the knowledge that, if nothing else, the Academy will come calling with an lifetime award before long.

I have a pretty good track record at the Oscar party I attend annually (I believe I’ve at least placed for the last three or four years running), and below are my picks. Normally, I’d provide commentary explaining them, but I don’t have time tonight.

In fact, the whole process has been rushed this year. Normally, I’d have spent the weeks leading up to tonight monitoring buzz, watching the movies, etc. (though, actually, viewing the nominated films can be a detriment since then your partiality to one film or another may get in the way of correctly predicting the Academy’s taste). Nonetheless, here we go.

• Supporting actress: Catherine Zeta-Jones, “Chicago”
• Supporting actor: Chris Cooper, “Adaptation”
• Documentary feature: “Bowling for Columbine”
• Documentary short: “Twin Towers”
• Animated short film: “Mike’s New Car”
• Live action short film: “Johnny Flynton”
• Art direction: “Gangs of New York”
• Cinematography: “Road to Perdition”
• Costume design: “Chicago”
• Sound: “Chicago”
• Sound editing: “The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers”
• Visual effects: “The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers”
• Film editing: “Chicago”
• Original score: “The Hours”
• Makeup: “Frida”
• Animated feature: “Lilo & Stitch”
• Foreign language film: “Nowhere in Africa”
• Original song: “I Move On,” from “Chicago”
• Adapted screenplay: “The Hours”
• Original screenplay: “Far From Heaven”
• Leading actress: Renee Zellwegger, “Chicago”
• Leading actor: Daniel Day-Lewis, “Gangs of New York”
• Directing: Rob Marshall, “Chicago”
• Best picture: “Chicago”

I’ll report tomorrow on how many I got right. Usually 15 or 16 out of 24 categories correct is good enough to place. Here’s a good site comparing the critics’ picks to click. Good luck!

For the record, I hope Scorsese and “The Two Towers” win big.

Has anyone else been watching Showtime’s new Friday-night lineup? Both “Family Business” and “Penn & Teller: Bullshit!” are very funny.

“Family Business,” a reality TV treatment of the life of adult filmmaker Adam Glasser — aka Seymore Butts — borrows elements a little too obviously from “The Osbournes.” Glasser’s mother and cousin work with him in the business, and once again the juxtaposition of the protagonist’s wacky show biz career and typical home life is supposed to have us weak-kneed with laughter.

And while there are some funny bits — people’s reactions to what Adam does for a living never gets old, for example — the show’s already a little bit tired after only a few episodes.

“Penn & Teller: Bullshit!” is just genius, though. Penn’s narration is hilarious, and his use of precisely the right swear word at just the right time to puncture his target’s pompousness is priceless. I highly recommend the program.

It’s a measure of how far the Bulls have fallen that one rates a game nowadays based on the entertainment value of the goofy fan competitions, half time entertainment, and scoreboard giveaways.

Last night, the Bulls beat the Knicks 100-98 in a typically lackluster game characterized by lots of turnovers, though the Bulls Eddie Curry was impressive and the Bulls were able to penetrate very successfully against the Knicks’ porous defense.

But the most significant thing about the final score is that by reaching the century mark, everyone in attendance was entitled to a free Big ‘N Tasty sandwich from McDonald’s within 48 hours.

Oh, the joy. Not to mention that the animated scoreboard race between Cuppy Coffee, Biggy Bagel and Dashing Donut came out in my favor. Because Dashing won I am also entitled to a free doughnut within 48 hours. There’s a nutritious combo for you.

Unfortunately, the evening was not ideal since the most entertaining Bulls’ timeout contest was not presented. That is when two fans are packed inside of a huge, inflatable Benny the Bull costumes and race across the full length of the court against one another.

Of course, they can hardly move inside the costumes and if you are fortunate enough to see one of the contestants trip and fall, you will laugh as never before. To watch the person vainly struggle to get right side up again is to understand perfectly the essence of hilarity.

Once again, we were denied.

A friend of Karen’s has free tickets to tonight’s Bulls-Knicks game, which is sure to be a thrill a minute. Of course we’re going. This will take valuable time away from my Oscar-pick research, but free tickets are free tickets.

Cubs’ reliever Antonio Alfonseca, known affectionately — one presumes — as “el pulpo” (octopus) for the extra digit on each hand, will be out until May after slipping on the wet infield grass in a spring training game.

The Cubs were already chancing it by deciding to stay with Alfonseca as their primary closer, though closers are generally overrated. Now they will have to make it through the first month with a closer-by-committee setup. This could turn out well as it did in 2000 when Tom Gordon’s absence early on gave Jeff Fassero and Kyle Farnsworth the opportunity to shine and gain their manager’s confidence, or it could be the first in a series of misfortunes that will tell the story of the Cubs in 2003.

Anyone care to place their bets?

So, for now, the Oscars are still set for Sunday, but with no red carpet. What would a postponement accomplish, exactly? If Wednesday had not seen the start of a long-expected war but, say, a terrorist tragedy parallel to Sept. 11, then I could understand some reticence.

But even considering a postponement is just self-aggrandizing Hollywood at its best. I think the entertainment press doesn’t think the Oscar races are too interesting this year. And why roll up the red carpet? Out of deference to the war effort, it’s said. Huh? I don’t understand what the connection between the two is supposed to be.

Or is it that actors are so terrified of some kind of terrorist attack — because we all know Joan Rivers is target No. 1, right after the White House? Puh-leeze. Get a grip, Hollywood. Just do the show.

I understand, though, that if something important happens during the broadcast, the show will be stopped for breaking news (because, you know, there are only three broadcast stations, no radio, no Internet …) and then resumed right where the action left off. That means the show could be even longer than usual, perhaps hitting the five or six-hour mark.

I can’t believe we’ll have to wait that long just to see some dopey musical win best picture. Oh, well. I’ll upload my Oscar picks sometime tomorrow, so stay tuned if you want to win the big prize at your Oscar party.

In the meantime, here’s a great source for Oscar buzz.

A member of Ohio’s 594th National Guard Unit legally changed his name to Optimus Prime — you know, the leader of the Autobots, aka the “good” Transformers.

Here’s a piece a local TV station did on the guy.